One thing that’s pretty hard to come by in a city like New York is a parking spot. And after driving around and around and AROUND and finally finding that beautiful spot, why would you ever actually use the car again because the anxiety of coming back from your errand and having to re-park the car just overwhelms you. In a perfect world, you would just leave your car in the same spot for eternity. However, leaving it in that beautiful spot isn’t an option anyway because of the ultra convenient alternate-side parking rules.
In a city where a parking spot is not exactly a dime a dozen, entire blocks have to be emptied of cars on one side of the street for an hour and a half twice a week (in my hood) so that the most idiotic-looking vehicle can spew some disgusting liquid all over the streets and passersby in the most sorry effort to “clean” the streets. If you don’t move your car, the street sweeper just angrily goes around your car, but of course then the meter maids come through and ticket you, boot you or even have you towed! This hellish situation at times can lead to some interesting scenes because people will do just about anything to avoid having to drive around and around and AROUND at 8am looking for a parking spot. As the amazing short film “Don’t Even Think About Parking Here” demonstrates, many people avoid this by double parking on the other side of the street and waiting 1.5 hours for the street sweeper to come through and the no parking window to end. You can find these people all over the city sitting in their car doing a crossword puzzle, talking on the phone, reading the newspaper or even studying for finals. I have come up with a different solution.
As a stay-at-home-mom, I’m the one tasked with “moving the car,” as it is called. You may have gathered that this is much easier said than done. Now add a baby into the equation, and voilà! you end up with the ridiculous scenario that Pookie and I experienced today.
I had to move the Zaydemobil (as our friend has so accurately named our 1998 champagne- colored Chrysler hand-me-down from RR’s grandparents) at 8am this morning. How can the street sweeper be so rude as to require me to move the car exactly when Pookie should be sitting down to have his breakfast?! Don’t they know that Buddhababy has to eat?! Anyway, in an attempt to avoid the “Alternate side parking dance.” I decided we would kill some time at Whole Foods. We would park in their (wait, what?) PARKING GARAGE, make some purchases (I mean, come on, we always need something from Whole Foods) in order to get validated parking, re-park the car in roughly the same spot, and have breakfast in the car as we wait for the no parking window to end.
In my opinion, this was just the most absurd way to spend our morning. I must say, however, that as annoying as it all was, Pookie didn’t seem to mind. He enjoyed getting into the shopping cart at Whole Foods and “accidentally” smashing a banana (which I left in some corner of the store – oops!). As for breakfast in the car, he really didn’t seem bothered by that either.
All in all though, it would be nice to not have to deal with this. If we lived in New Orleans or some other small city, as you know I’m pushing for, we would have a driveway or even a garage, and it would be lovely to never have to concern ourselves with the alternate side parking ordeal. We could spend all of our mornings having breakfast in the highchair. Just sayin’.
Read another fun parking story here.